How I threatened God

We have to be willing to risk it all to get to a place where we can be known, be fully loved and fully love another.

This is may seem like an extreme statement but if you think about it, it’s true.

We have to be willing to give up everything we hold onto, including our biggest and greatest possession.

This thought is deeper than my writing, so if you are able to try to read between the lines and think about this in your own life, please do so.

Have you ever seen that image where the little girl is holding a little teddy bear and Jesus is asking her to give it to him, and in return he has a massive teddy bear behind his back? But she can’t see it so she’s afraid of giving it up. But if she is willing to get rid of it, in return she will have something much better.

I know that I have not lived a long time, or been in a married relationship, but I have noticed something about my relationship with Luke that has taught me so much.


It wasn’t until recently that Luke and I had to experience what it was to almost lose everything. In order to know one another, and love each other on a deeper level, we had to be willing to risk everything we had.

It is terrifying. It can at times hurt. Being willing to give up everything, and at times actually having to give up what you have in order to experience a deeper love and understanding.

Jesus calls us to give him everything we have. Many of us are fearful of giving him everything because we are not sure what will be returned. 

A lot of us give so much of ourselves in hopes that it will bring a return that is satisfying, when in reality we have to be willing to sacrifice it all to fully understand His sacrifice for us.

To be fully known and fully loved is a desire in the human heart.

We have to be willing to give Jesus our flaws, our pains, our desires, our treasures, and everything.

Jesus sacrificed for us, but we are slow to sacrifice for him.

This is a challenge to myself to think about the one thing I am fearful of sacrificing.

We all have or will have a season or day where we give an ultimatum to God, a threat that if something else happens we will not do something, or give something to Him, or some may say we will not follow Him.

Have you ever said something like that out loud? I have at one point in my 22 years of living, and that is the moment I realized my hearts position.

I threatened God once. My life felt as if it was falling a part, and I said “you can have everything you’ve taken already but if you take one of my loved ones I can not follow you.”

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My heart was not aligning with God’s and I should have known that God owes me nothing, but I owe Him everything.

That night after my big threat, I was lying in bed when I felt a peace and a whisper “I am not taking from you, I am giving you this.” Giving me what? I was confused how this was a gift, but what I have learned is that Jesus does comfort, and He brings me peace.

I may not fully understand what He is giving me, but what I have learned from giving Him everything and allowing Him to fully take over, I have only gained.

I am so thankful our God is gracious, all knowing, a perfect judge and the most sacrificial.

That ultimatum we have needs to turn into what we ought to be willing to sacrifice. It sounds scary, and it is scary. But can we not trust the very one that created us? He has a far greater understanding of eternity than we will ever have.

Being willing to sacrifice does not mean you will lose everything, it just means getting your heart to a place where you are more in love with God than you are your circumstances. And a lot of the times, when we are willing to give everything we have to Him, as our hearts align with His we realize we have been over prioritizing something that needs to be let go of.

Sometimes our ultimatum is a threat of not wanting to lose our loved ones, family members, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, our health, our money, etc.

I often think about Abraham’s sacrifice. God asked Him to make a sacrifice. What was he willing to give God? His greatest treasure. His beloved son.

It’s terrifying. It doesn’t make sense. But the one thing He loves the most, he has to be willing to risk everything to be fully known and to be loved.

“But the angel of the Lord called out to him from heaven, “Abraham! Abraham!”
“Here I am,” he replied.
12 “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
13 Abraham looked up and there in a thicket he saw a ram[a] caught by its horns. He went over and took the ram and sacrificed it as a burnt offering instead of his son. 14 So Abraham called that place The Lord Will Provide. And to this day it is said, “On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”
15 The angel of the Lord called to Abraham from heaven a second time 16 and said, “I swear by myself, declares the Lord, that because you have done this and have not withheld your son, your only son, 17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring[b] all nations on earth will be blessed,[c] because you have obeyed me.” (Genesis 22:11-18)

God then blesses Him because He saw his Heart.

The fear of God is greater than living a life of empty or painful threats to the one who gave You everything.

The fear of God is a reverence to Him.

We have to be willing to sacrifice, some may have to actually sacrifice, but in return you will be fully known, and be fully loved.

Thank you for reading,

Tay Ruth

10 responses to “How I threatened God”

  1. ACountryBoy says:

    Great post. God is good…always!

  2. Gwen Acres says:

    God does not play games with us. He is for us and loves us unconditionally. We do not have to fear Him. He is with us always. In Him is our peace. Rest in His loving embrace, dear Taylor.

    • tayruth says:

      Gwen, thank you for the encouragement. God is perfect. When I say fear of God, I mean fear of being away from Him. Fear of God is a reverence to God. So thankful He is who He says he is! God bless! 🙂

  3. javagurl15 says:

    Wow! God works in mysterious ways. I am currently going through a situation that has been testing with this topic. My boyfriend and I are in the process of a “break period.” (not my decision lol) It has been very tough and hard on me and I have just kept asking God why would you not have favor on a godly relationship? And what I am realizing is that instead of having God take the reigns and me take the backseat, I have been the one who unintentional was trying to hold on to reigns, but I haven’t had a strong grip. I have been praying and asking the Lord to give me peace and words of wisdom during this time and I believe that this blog was in His perfect plan for me to read. Thank you, thank you, thank you for being vulnerable and transparent. That is not easy, but thank you Jesus that He has given you that freedom and peace to not care what other think, but only the King of Kings and Lord of Lords! God is sovereign through it all. I pray God continues to work in your life for His glory!

    Peace and Blessings,
    Madison Tilley

    • tayruth says:

      Wow, Madison! Thank you for responding with these words. I am praying for you, as I can only imagine what you must be feeling. When we allow God to be in control that means that no matter the outcome, our response will be to love Jesus more. Something I practice is being thankful in ALL circumstances, even the times I don’t understand and don’t feel naturally content. Thanks again for reading and responding! 🙂

  4. Jessica Tyler says:

    Overall, I agree with your post. We must be willing to trust God fully and allow Him to be Lord over our lives. Before we turn to God we have this self-protective barrier. If something even comes close to penetrating it, it goes right back up. But once we turn to God that barrier is broken and we lay our hearts down before Him trusting Him fully with our lives. We may not get exactly what we want sometimes but God gives us exactly what we need every day. He always knows what’s best when we do not. One part I didn’t quite agree with was the word “risk”. With God we do not risk everything we have. To risk something is to gamble or take a chance on something knowing you may lose it all in the end. It’s a false hope. With God, there is nothing to risk because He has already revealed to us what we are given through Scripture. Eternal life. That hope is real. I don’t take a chance on Him, I put my faith in Him because He can be trusted. I’m the one that can’t. This was a great reminder though! Thank you!

    • tayruth says:

      Jessica, I am not necessarily just talking about our relationship with God. And some do have to risk losing their loved ones to follow Jesus. But he’s worth everything. I don’t believe this is a disagreement because I agree with what you said, but maybe more of a different perspective. Thank you so much for reading. I’m glad it encouraged you.

  5. Jewel says:

    Hi Taylor! I’m not sure if you remember me, I went to Trinity with you sophomore year, but I was encouraged by reading this! I daily have to remind myself that the Lords ways are higher than my ways and that he is more faithful to me than I am to him. Anyway I was blessed by you today! Jewel Meyer-Hagen

    • tayruth says:


      Of course I remember you! I was so sad when you left. Thank you so much for your encouraging words and the sweetest comment. So thankful you read this! 🙂

  6. Morgan N says:

    Wow this is so encouraging and good! Thank you for sharing your heart, Taylor! It encourages me so much! 💟💟💟

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